I'd like to take a break from posts about my books and poetry to focus on a topic that has been on my heart recently. The reason I haven't posted this sooner is that I wanted to approach the subject with all the respect and sensitivity as possible. I am aware that this concern may be ignored by some...but I hope that you all will understand my heart. This all began several months, no years, ago with one question: we’re commanded to be the hands and feet of Jesus, but what happens when those hands are used to harm, and the feet to walk down paths they were never meant to traverse?
Are those actions simple missteps on the path toward righteousness, or are they pointing to a much more dangerous truth? If these questions are indeed worth seeking answers, I was left wondering, will I even find an answer to something that is either ignored, or blown far out of proportion? Where is the middle ground?
As a Christian, I have to ask those questions to myself, no matter how difficult answering them can be. Granted, I haven’t lived on this earth for a very long time. I’m a college student, a part-time worker, author, a millennial...the list seems endless sometimes. Despite that, I look at the world around me, and I’d have to be blind to not see the pain and suffering that surrounds me. Because I’m a Christian, I try to always see the world though a Biblical perspective. If you were to compare the Bible to a set of lenses, those are the glasses that I see the world through.
Seeing the world from a Biblical perspective isn’t easy. Honestly, it sometimes is downright painful. There is always going to be injustice in the world, but sometimes, that injustice comes from places you’d never hope to find, or expect. That’s right, I’m talking about the church. Now, before I continue on, I must stress something...I am NOT bashing the Church. The church is still relevant, and isn’t outdated. Let me repeat that; the church is still relevant, and isn’t outdated. However, in my relatively short years, I have seen some of the most amazing people in my life suffer the greatest at the hands of the congregation...and that reality caused me to delve into a deep soul-searching session that would last for several years. Honestly, it’s still on-going. But through this time of questioning and seeking, I’ve discovered a grace that far surpasses anything I’ve ever known.
How can the church be called by God to be the salt and light of the world when we shun those in need of the light? I’ve always been a passionate person. If I believe in something, I will defend it until my dying breath. My faith is no different. When I was in youth groups, I heard stories of people I knew walking away from the church, and those stories always bothered me. Why were they leaving? Didn’t they know it was...wrong? I felt sad, being one of the last of my peers still in the sanctuary on Sunday morning. Then, I always wondered...what’s so wrong with the church that would make them do something so rash?
And then, the answer hit far too close to home. A dear friend of mine was burned by the church in ways that to this day still make me incredibly angry. Not only did this person undergo brutally verbal mistreatment, but they were left emotionally scarred from the trauma. As I stood alongside my friend in the trenches, so to speak, I found myself asking that age-old question. Why would God let this happen? This friend of mine certainly hadn't done anything to deserve such awful treatment. As they were left asking why, I myself asked the same.
No, I never experienced the same degree of wounds from the church. My childhood years spent at church on Sundays and Wednesdays were uneventful at the least and often exciting at most. I did experience quite an awful amount of bullying from my peers, but I never blamed the church for that. My teachers were always kind and I never was yelled at, mocked, or belittled by authority figures. With all that being said, I'm sure some out there would question my reasons or right to talk about this subject. If I didn't experience it, then why would I even bother saying anything? I may not have dealt with it personally, but because my friend and I are so close, I had to see what that pain did to them, as well as others that I know.
Ephesians 4:32 says, "Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." This is a scripture that I see many people in my church living out to it's fullest. They're kind, open, and will do almost anything for you. Even on bad days, they're quick to come to your aid if you need it, and that's something my family and I have truly appreciated over the years. Then, there are those who don't. Now, this isn't a comparison rant post. I'm not going to describe these people and give a list of all the things I think they're doing wrong. I'm not to judge, that's God's job. I can only state what I see before my own eyes for the sake of clarity. There is a truth in that there are many judgmental people in the church. If you don't believe me, then ask around your community. In my previous job, two of the four coworkers around my age admitted to me that they had been hurt by the church, and that was the primary reason they didn't believe in God.
Why is this such a common thread? It honestly hurts my heart. As followers of Christ, we're called to reach out to the lost and show them the light of Christ. We're not supposed to turn people away because they're not like us, or are struggling with some pretty big things. Haven't we all dealt with sin? Salvation isn't a pedestal. It isn't designed to lift you above the masses, and parade you about as the pinnacle of human idolatry. It isn't meant to be puffed up with pride, but open, and honest, with humility. The problem is, a lot of people don't see it that way. They wear their salvation as a badge of honor, believing that they're somehow better then everyone else. Pride is certainly dangerous, but in the church, it can wreak devastating consequences.
How do we avoid those traps? How can we, the church, do a better job at loving those in desperate need of God's touch? How can someone who's been hurt by the church ever be healed, and be able to see the church in a good light, as God intended?
It starts when God's people get on their knees, and repent. Then, it's important to spend time in God's Word. Joshua 1:8 explains this perfectly, "Study this book of instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do." In order to live according to God's Word, we have to know it. We can't expect to live a Godly life without it. This isn't something you can use to point a finger at someone else in judgement or even well wishes...it is a microscope. Like the sword spoken about in Hebrews 4:12, the Word cuts through all lies and pretense, revealing the true intent of the heart. If we ever wish to see true change, we have to be willing to turn that sword upon ourselves and learn where we need to find forgiveness and healing. As the saying goes, hurting people hurt people, and there are far too many wounded sitting in the sanctuary, as well as in the world at large.
Do you know someone in your life who has been hurt by the church? Have you ever asked them what is still holding them back from seeking God, despite their pain? Be encouraged to reach out to them, you never know what they may be dealing with. It says in 2 Timothy 2:25 that we are to "Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people's hearts, and they will learn the truth." It could be that in their pain, they really need someone to come alongside them and be willing to show them love, where others wouldn't. Even if something hasn't directly affected you, like my friend's pain afflicted by the church, still be willing to step out of your comfort zone to gain more understanding.
If we ever wish to turn this tide around, we'll have to be willing to get to work to fix it. Yes, it will be hard, and often painful, but in the end, it will be far worth it. In order to help those outside of the church who need Jesus, we must first help the hurting in our congregations, who perhaps have been wounded similarly to my friend. Once we've done that, then we will be far more effective at reaching the lost and telling them the good news. It may be work, and it might not be what we want to do, but it's highly necessary if we wish to truly impact the world. 2 Timothy 2:3-4 enforces this, saying, "Endure suffering alone with me, as a good soldier of Christ Jesus. Soldiers don't get tied up in the affairs of civilian life, for then they cannot please the officer who enlisted them."
If you've been hurt by the church, please don't give up. Don't lose faith in God, and don't lose heart. You're not alone, and you're not abandoned. If my friend can go through so much pain, and still cling to faith, I know you can, too. If you're like me, and you haven't experienced that kind of pain, know that you're still able to make a difference. You can make a real change in someone's life, and it all starts when you walk in love instead of judgment. This world can be very dark and hopeless. It can be really hard, full of days when you wonder if this is all worth it...but I promise you, it is. I've dealt with enough of my own hurts and negative experiences to tell you that I have a little experience in the pain department. But we all do. We're placed on earth at this time in history for a reason, and I'm banking on that fact. Even in our greatest hurt, God is still there for us, and I know He's been there for me.
I wish you all the best, and know that I pray for every single one of you. I believe in you, I know God's created you to do amazing things, and I hope that you'll see that someday. Don't lose heart! If you are hurting from these sort of wounds, please don't hesitate to reach out. You're not alone, and you CAN get help! God won't give up on you, and I pray you find peace and healing under His wings.
(Picture not my own, found on google images.)
