Sunday, August 25, 2019

Christianity - At What Cost?



Life often throws curve balls that we don't expect. Just like a summer storm can appear on the horizon with little warning, we often are found completely unprepared for change. The reality is that when the wind that whips in our faces as a thunderstorm approaches, the warning signs of potentially damaging weather are all there. People have often told me that life offers no such warnings, situations always coming unexpectedly, whether good or bad. While I certainly have dealt with such change in my relatively short lifespan, I've come to realize that there are indeed signs of change, regardless of the situation. The problem is that we are so often woefully blind to it, and we can't afford that luxury anymore.

Friends, there is a real enemy out there. He wants to steal, kill, and destroy everything in your life. He almost took someone incredibly close to me, and God in His mercy and grace redeemed and restored the situation in a way that I in my most desperate prayers hadn't even imagined. I've never seen someone change for the better so dramatically in just a mere four months, and I know for a fact that without God's direct hand in the situation, that change never would have occurred. The amount of gratitude and awe I am experiencing after looking that person in the eye and seeing the fire of God in Her eyes changed me. Truly, truly changed me. And over the past two days, I have never felt so convicted hearing someone who once shunned God tell me that we need to live every day like it is our last.

Let me tell you something. Battles change a person, for better or for worse. You can always see it in their eyes. Seeing someone so dear to me, someone who I had feared for her life, talk openly about faith, breakthrough, and being unashamed for Christ made me take a look inward and realize there's a lot of junk cluttering my own soul. We should live every day like our last, and yet we live every minute pretending that we're eternal on this side of heaven. We treat grace like a credit card that we can use as long as we don't max it out, and even then we can make payments to continue using it, ignoring the fact that we're only obtaining more debt.

I find it so interesting that God often uses the most unlikely people to carry His message of truth, including those who are younger then myself. It was through this person that I was issued a very profound challenge. Am I truly living my life for Christ, or do I have Him stuck in my back pocket, only to be brought out when I need help, like some sort of cosmic genie? Is He truly my everything, or just a part of my world? Would I really sacrifice everything for Him to the point of death? Would I be willing to surrender the totality of my life for Him? And an ever more difficult question remains...

Would I be willing to live for Him?

I have made a new commitment to Christ. For too long we have been stuck in 'modern' Christianity with all of its nuances, pomp, and circumstances. I'm not saying that the modern Church is a failure, but there are a lot of things that need to change if we are ever going to truly be the Church Jesus died for us to be. I myself have been a part of this, and am just as much to blame. How many times have I personally skirted on the edges of both camps, thinking it was safe to dwell in the world, as well as live my life as a Christian?

We must realize that we truly are living in the last days. We don't have the luxury of pretending we're not in a war, when the reality is that it is raging all around us. The problem is that we need to open our eyes and unplug our ears so that we can see the chaos around us for what it truly is: a broken world that is in desperate need of redemption. It also is a world that will be judged one day, and I don't know about you, but I want to be on the right side of the line when it is drawn. We all say that we are Christians, but do we truly understand what it means to be one? What true sacrifice is? I for one sure haven't. To be honest, I don't know how true persecution feels. I'm am American who has never left her country, has never crossed the ocean, and has never set foot in another country. Do I want to? Absolutely. I truly believe that God has called me to Germany, and one day I know that dream of mine to travel there will come true. Don't ask me why, either, because I don't have the answer yet. All I know is that I have a passion for that country, and one day I believe that it will all make sense. But you know what? Sometimes God doesn't want things to make sense. Sometimes He wants us to follow in in full obedience and trust, having faith that no matter how scary things get, we are committed to the Kingdom, and not our own earthly desires.

I for one refuse to live a lukewarm life. I sure have a lot to work on in my own life, but there are a lot of hurting people out there, and if I don't focus on my own walk with God, I'll never be able to be used by Him to help those people. I can't fix someone else's wounds when I'm bleeding out due to my own. I am reminded of the scripture in Isaiah 6:8 that says, "And I heard the Voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?" I said, "Here I am, send me."

The reality is that we'll never be perfect. We'll never have it all together. But you know what? That doesn't disqualify us from honoring God with our lives and deciding to serve Him. We are standing on a precipice that has been birthed of our choices, both good and bad, and we can't keep using the grace card to think we can get away with sin and live our lives for ourselves. We are either on the throne of our hearts, or God is. There's no sharing that seat...but sadly a lot of people believe it's a co-dependent relationship. We must choose who we are going to serve, and once we decide that we are indeed going to live for Christ, we actually need to do so, even if that means great personal sacrifice. Because ultimately, it will be worth it in the end. No matter what hardships we face, if God is in the center of it, we can know that it isn't a pointless struggle. Even when we question the terrors of the night, we always believe that the light of the sun will touch our faces each dawn. If we can't live our lives fully surrendered to Christ, which is a day by day walk, then we are meddling with the enemy and will be in for a rude awakening one day. If we truly want to serve Christ, then we must make that leap of faith, fully surrendering our own desires, and letting go of the fear that tethers us to the ground so we can touch the sky.

I wrote a short poem that I think is a fitting close to this post. I am aware that some of my writing may come across strong, but the truth cannot be sugarcoated. I encourage you all to truly seek God, and ask for Him to transform your lives. Believe me, you won't regret it.

Green lights, pale faces,
Onward, the dawn races,
Into the hectic life we know.

Striving, ever onward,
To always try to conquer,
The untamed beats of time.

When will we realize we're riddled with grace?
Unfazed, the sun hits our cheeks every morn.
The wind banishes our fears from every trace,
Of the ache that rises like mountains, forlorn.

Someday we will recognize the truth,
That blazes ever onward like the stars.
Our striving isn't wasted in our youth,
One day, our dreams won't be so far.





(Image obtained on google images, not my own.)

The Warriors of Aragnar isn't Gone and Neither am I!

  This. Has. Been. A. Year. I have wanted to write so much on this blog over the past months. So, so, many things have taken place. In many ...