Courageous: Breaking the Mental Health Stigma in the Church

We’ve all heard the words before.

“Just have more faith, it’ll be okay.”

But is it really okay? No. When people of great faith fight battles that don't seem to go away, is it truly a weakness of belief in God's power on their behalf? I know many people who fit into this category, and I know for certain that their faith is not too small, nor is God too weak. The reality is that a lot of God-fearing Christians struggle with mental health battles, and are largely misunderstood in the place that they should be supported and understood the most. I wish this statement wasn't true. We, the body of Christ, are called to be His hands and feet, but more often then not those hands hurt the wounded and the feet drive the misunderstood away. Why is this the case? Is it a simple misunderstanding, or a choice by many to remain ignorant to the truth? The answer is both.

The subject of mental health is already often confusing to a lot of people, especially if they’ve never experienced a mental illness firsthand or had a family member or friend battle it. Because of that fact, many don’t understand it or regard it as an actual illness, but that doesn’t make ignorance okay. Especially in the body of Christ.

The Bible is clear that the mind is powerful, and it is chock-full with scriptures describing it as the battlefield where true wars are waged. It should be noted that in Matthew 22:37, Jesus says, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." We know a lot about the spiritual importance of the heart and soul, as both of these have strong symbolic meaning in the Word, but what about the mind? Why would the mind be mentioned alongside these two if it wasn't just as important? The reality is that we are so quick to question the heart and intent of a subject, but intent doesn't reside in the heart alone. Intent also is borne of the mind. The mind is where the greatest battles take place, and it is a critical weapon in our arsenal...the problem is that we have no idea how impactful it is, or how to use it. In 2 Corinthians 1:4-5, it says "For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ." That doesn't sound like a petty circumstance to me. The Bible is clear that we as Christians must take our thoughts captive and train our thoughts onto Christ. Much like a soldier who prepares for battle, we are charged with the task of guarding our hearts and minds.

So, what does all of this have to do with mental illness? Well, I'm glad you asked. The stigma that mental illness is simply an attention-seeking pity grab has been a long-lasting one. I still to this day run into people who don't believe that mental illnesses are real. Others, that counseling is a sham. Sadly, I've run into many people in the church who adhere to these beliefs, and it deeply saddens me. As Christ followers, we of all people should understand that because the mind is such a powerful weapon, the enemy is going to do everything he can to attack it. Now, let me be clear, I am not saying that mental illnesses are purely spiritual. Just as the body can experience a cold of the flu, the mind can experience real sickness, too. Yes, the Word is powerful and God is mightier then any ailment, but that doesn't mean that we should pass off a very real sickness for fiction.

Now, I'm not attacking anyone or attempting to condemn. My heart behind this article is to educate. I myself do not fight a mental illness, and I know that sounds strange. Don't people who actually struggle with something speak up about it? If I don't fight it, what could I possibly have to say? A whole lot more then one might actually think. The reality is that more people need to raise awareness, and more people need to take a stand for what's right. I'm no hero or champion in any regard, but I don't like any kind of bully...especially bullies that have names such as depression and anxiety. Many of my friends fight these two illnesses, and by being there for them and supporting them, I've learned a whole lot. I see what helps them...but I also see what hurts them. The sad truth is that more things hurt then heal, and a lot of people don't understand what they actually face on a daily basis. I myself only have a glimpse into the life of someone who has to wake up every morning wishing that they didn't. The kind of pain that is a constant in their lives. I've seen them hurt by the church, and so burnt out by it all that they've almost walked from their faith. But also, I have seen such an incredible strength, as well as a courageous trust in God despite that pain. The kind of strength that makes you blink in unbelief when they get back up despite the blood on their lip and still keep fighting.

The reality is that if the world thinks those who fight with a mental illness are weak, those people have never seen true strength. They also don't understand true faith. Paul certainly understood it, and 2 Corinthians 12:10 clearly explains this, "That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." True strength is found when we lay aside our own pride and glory and surrender those desires to Christ. Instead of adhering to pious religion, we as Christians must lay aside our own desires to take up Christ. The problem is that a lot of people like 'playing Christian' but don't actually ever serve the God they say they love so much. When the heart is lukewarm, there's no conviction. And when there's no conviction, there's no standard. And when there's no standard...there's no true alliance. Thankfully, that doesn't have to be the case. God wants His people to turn to Him, He desires for us to walk with Him in this path called life. God is loving, and we are never alone. A truly wonderful scripture comes to mind when I think of the pain this world is riddled with. In Psalms 73:26, it says, "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Also, in Isaiah 40:29, we are reminded that, "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak."

I am well aware that I could easily be addressing both sides of this subject in this article, and that's okay. I want to encourage, but also to educate. If you're struggling with any form of mental illness, please take heart, and know that you're not as alone as you think you are. You're a fighter...and you've made it this far. God loves you, and He hasn't abandoned you, even in the darkest moments when you feel like you have nothing left. Just wait, and hang on a little longer; you're closer to the light then you know. Perhaps you're in the same situation as myself, maybe someone you love is fighting this war, and you want to do everything you can to help. Please believe me when I say this; you ARE helping, and what you do DOES make a difference. Don't let your fears, discouragement, and even weariness wear you down. Remember that God is your strength, and that you are loved. Maybe, just maybe, you've even lost someone along the way to suicide. I won't even dare to say that I understand exactly how that feels, but I was very close to having my life altered forever, had God not intervened in a dear friend's life just in time. Please know that God understands your pain, and in that hurt, turn to Him for comfort and love that only the Almighty can provide. And finally, if you are unsure or skeptical that mental illnesses are real, I encourage you to do some research. Ask some questions, and be willing to look at it with an open mind. You might be surprised by what you discover. God loves you dearly, and He wants you to walk in truth. Every single one of you are precious in God's eyes, no matter what you're going through, or what you have faced. Because at the end of the day, as long as we have Christ, we are never truly alone. And now, it's our job to tell the hurting world of God's redemptive, healing love.
   

Villains and the Christian Writer: How Dark is Too Dark?

Villains. Nearly every story has one.

All writers know that there must be some form of opposition in their story. Oftentimes in fiction, the hero is thrust into the "journey" by the means of a villain, or at least an opposing force that disrupts their way of life in some way. After all, if nothing ever happened to change the hero's life or to shift their course, would they even become the hero they're later known to be? 

Villains have a very important role in the story, regardless of how terrible people (or creatures) they are. Because of their impact, they often carry a legacy long after the story is over. Why is it then that villains can be more remembered and popularized than heroes? Characters such as Darth Vader, the Joker, Hannibal Lecter, Sauron, and Voldemort are just a few examples of antagonists who have become very well known in our culture. Every good hero often has a contrasting villain who is good...at being bad. 

 Naturally, this legacy they carry isn't a good one, it is simply a memorable one. Our society tends to put a heavy focus on villains, and while that certainly is problematic, it is a phenomenon that should be addressed by Christian writers. There certainly are two sides to this coin, considering that there are many books and movies that make things too easy for the hero, leaving the reader with a character who seems overwhelmingly good without enough flaws that make them relatable. How can writers create stories with memorable heroes and villains without becoming cliche? And an even deeper question must be presented, which is the heartbeat of this article; where should Christian writers stand on writing villains, and how dark is too dark? 

I personally haven't shied away from presenting my villains as dark, depraved people. After all, we live in a fallen world that is ripe with sin and despair, and I personally believe that stories shouldn't sugarcoat that truth. The reality is that even though characters are indeed fictional, they still should be treated as real, three-dimensional people when written into a story. So often I read books with washed, ignorant heroes and FAR-too-attractive-for-their-own-good villains. However, on the other side of the coin, I have tried my best to present villains as people who are driven by something, and have motivations that back their actions. People often view themselves as the heroes in their own stories, and villains can certainly fall into this category.

Give heroes faults, and don't gloss over their weaknesses. Heroes are human, they have fears, and they are far from perfect. Give them a reason to want to give up, and a drive to live for something. Likewise, give villains qualities, don't make them one-sided antagonists. Villains are human, they have strengths, and often aren't purely evil. Give them a reason to want to fight, and a drive to die for something.  

Good villains are memorable in part because they are willing to do whatever it takes to accomplish their goals. They also are generally intelligent, charismatic people who tend to attract others to their causes. In fact, heroes can have these qualities too, but they aren't as prolific, and often are far more naive. Even though the 'ignorant hero' cliche often works, it also can often become boring...and when such a hero is contrasted by a complex, fully developed villain, they can be quickly overshadowed.

I have long striven as a writer to create heroes that are just as complex and fledged out as my villains. Even though I still have a lot to learn in my own writing journey, I know this goal is possible. We live in a culture that is obsessed with heroes. Movies about superheroes are always flooding the theaters, and prove that deep down, we long to feel safe, and protected, but sadly many of these heroes are one-dimensional and flat (don't worry, Avengers Endgame is NOT in that category, hehe). In order to create heroes that truly are worth the title, they have to be able to be just as interesting as the villain. As a Christian writer, my ultimate goal in writing my stories is to point people back to God, but sometimes showing the darkness for what it truly is can have a very impactful purpose. Yes, I believe there is a line that shouldn't be crossed, but depicting depravity that naturally takes place in a fallen world can be used as a tool to point people to the greatest hero of all, a hero that can truly set the captives free. 

Coming Soon: Wings of Revelation!

In the past couple of months, I have received countless messages and emails, all asking one question: when will Aragnar 3 be released? Thankfully, the answer is a good one: very soon! Editing took a little longer this go around, but my editor just finished up her last tweaks, and now all it needs is formatting to make it pretty! Even though I don't have an exact date yet, I'll be sure to let you all know as soon as I do! 

Naturally, this release it but one of the many plates I am spinning. My graduation is rapidly approaching (cue the Jaws music), and I'm quite immersed in the arduous process of writing book 4, Wings of Redemption. Why arduous, you might as? Well...you see, the fourth book is by far the most important, and not just because it is the last installation in the Aragnar series. It also will be the largest book in the series, chock-full of important things that will be even more important when I release my next book (now, cue evil laughter). I already have been having so much fun with it, and I can't wait to share the finale of this crazy story with you all! 

In the meantime, be prepared for book 3 and enjoy the beautiful cover art! Here is the official synopsis!

"For many decades, stories of betrayal, darkness, and blood have surrounded the mysterious land of Aragnar. Now, on the run and in desperate need of refuge, the Aragnarian people are scattered throughout their country, quickly losing their hope for a better future. When a young woman is forced to make the most difficult choices of her life, the consequences will affect her destiny, as well as the outcome of the looming war. 

The mighty Aragnarian kingdom Arinum has fallen, razed to the ground in dragon fire, and the whole world will shudder in its wake. A terrible conspiracy unfolds, and Aleron slowly begins to uncover how deep Lucius's grip on his country runs...at great cost. In Maria’s desperation to rescue him, she must make a choice…would she be willing to forever alter the fates of many to save the man she loves?"

I truly look forward to sharing this story with you all!

Far Side of the Sea: A Gem for any Historical Fiction Lover's Library

I recently was given the wonderful opportunity to read Kate Breslin's newest historical fiction, "Far Side of the Sea" before it was released yesterday. This book was so incredibly good, I had to write a shining review for it and share it with you all!  

"Far Side of the Sea" was a true triumph of a read, and has once again proven author Kate Breslin's skill at penning a story well worth reading. 

Set in WWI like her previous two novels, "Far Side of the Sea" follows the story of Lieutenant Colin Mabry, who happens to be the brother of Grace Mabry, the main character of "Not By Sight". I truly appreciated that she linked both books together, and seeing familiar faces in "Far Side of the Sea" felt as if I were reuniting with old friends. This novel follows the story of Colin as he struggles to adjust to life after receiving a major injury on the front. His relatively safe, predictable post is turned upside down when he receives a message by carrier pigeon...a message written by a young woman he had loved, Jewel Reyer, whom he had thought dead. 

The truth, however, is far more complicated, as Colin flies to war-ridden France only to discover that the note wasn't written by Jewel, but by her half-sister, Johanna. Initially distrustful of the young woman's motives, Colin soon learns that it is believed Jewel is indeed alive...but in the hands of a German agent. Determined to fulfill a promise of love he had made to Jewel, he sets out with Johanna to find her, despite the risks involved. As Colin and Johanna learn to trust each other to survive, not only to they begin to grow fond of one other, but the stakes are raised to an incredibly costly price. With the risk of enemy spies around every corner, every action they make is a potentially life-threatening one. As they draw closer to the truth, which is far more complex then either of them realized, they also grow closer together. 

"Far Side of the Sea" was a truly wonderful read, one that I couldn't put down. It was the perfect blend of suspense and romance, tastefully filled with Christian themes that never were overpowering or cliche. I loved getting to know Colin and Johanna, they were wonderfully fleshed-out characters who were very relatable and understandable. The fact that this story was set against the backdrop of WWI was very interesting, considering that there aren't many historical fiction books focusing on this incredibly interesting time period. Her stories always have been so immersive, and this book is no different. I have enjoyed every single book that Breslin has released, and second to For Such a Time, "Far Side of the Sea" certainly must be my next favorite! 

How to Train Your Dragon 3: An Emotional Climax to an Epic Trilogy

In a world of remakes and underwhelming films, every once and a while, a movie breaks from that stereotype and rises to the occasion, truly setting it apart. How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World did just that, and more, in the latest and final installation of the series.

Ever since the first How to Train Your Dragon movie hit theaters in 2010, I have truly loved the storytelling, complex world, and beautiful animation of these films. Ever a lover of a good, well-written fantasy, how could I not? The endearing story of a forbidden friendship forged in adversity truly warmed my heart. The second movie only continued to carry the mantle of the first, and so, with the knowledge that the third was indeed the final chapter in a film trilogy, I knew that it was most likely going to be very good, a little emotional, and well worth the cost to see it in theaters.

The Hidden world not only met those expectations, but exceeded them. Loaded with jaw-dropping animation that definitely took it up a notch from the last film, an emotionally gut-punching score, and a story of growth and life, the film truly was a treasure trove of topics to explore.

Hiccup is a character who I have truly loved, and seeing his growth over the span of three movies was truly special. I believe a lot of people my age can relate to his hesitation to embrace the unknown, and even his immediate denial of the changes rapidly coming his way. These hesitations  are what directs many of his actions in the first half of this film, and bring about consequences that only make things harder for him, as well as every human and dragon who call Berk home.

The following events provide very clear hints of the greater problem at stake: Hiccup's belief that without Toothless, he is nothing, and his inability to let the dragon go. He clings to the belief that the vikings and dragons are meant to live harmoniously no matter what danger their lifestyle attracts, and that letting them go is not even an option. His desperation to hold fast to this belief is obvious, as he suggests wild concepts to keep them all together. However, this isn't just about dragons, not even about toothless. Hiccup truly doubts his ability to lead, and is often seen running away from his more 'boring' responsibilities to be with his dragon. This obviously has caused a rift between him and the others, the most obvious being between him and his love interest, Astrid. Even though she loves him, she is hesitant to marry him when he's so set in his ways. 

We all can tend to avoid the things that scare us, even if it estranges us from those who truly care. And life Hiccup soon experiences, life has a way of pushing us into change, whether we like it or not. When Toothless encounters a female of his species, a natural distance begins to grow between dragon and rider. Even though Hiccup fights it at first, hopelessly believing that the wild, untamed "light fury" will somehow be content with the others in their human/dragon utopia, he soon comes to realize that nature is indeed taking its course, and he must stop fighting against it. 

Ultimately, the things we love the most are the things that we must one day let go. This truth was beautifully illustrated in a touching flashback, reinforcing that love, even though it hurts, is worth embracing. Hiccup learns this through a series of harrowing encounters, battles, and near-death experiences. As long as the dragons remain with the vikings, they will always be in danger from villains like Grimmel, who was responsible for killing off the rest of Toothless's kind. It is then that Hiccup sees the truth; if he truly loves his friend, he has to be willing to say goodbye.

There is something to be said here about friendships. Life has a way of changing relationships, and as we grow, there are times that we must part ways with people, things, places, or even parts of ourselves. However, that doesn't mean that it is permanent or bad...goodbyes don't always last forever. True friendships never die, and from a Christian perspective, we know that goodbyes, however permanent they seem (such as death) aren't final. Whether in this life or eternity, we know that friendships formed by God, trials, and years of closeness aren't broken, even if life causes natural separation for a time.  

The Hidden World truly was a wonderful yet tearful finale to a trilogy that proved that good storytelling still exists, even in Hollywood. Hopefully we will see more original content like this one in the future, because even though I am glad that they ended the series on a glorious note, I wasn't ready to see it end. But that's how all the best stories are, and how they should continue to be. 

A Call to Courage: The Ups and Downs of Life

It has been FAR too long since I posted, and in the flurry of life, I admittedly forgot that my last posting was months ago. My goodness, I know I'm going crazy! Though, in my defense (even though I honestly have little excuse) things have been ridiculously, insanely, busy. You'd think that a nearly-graduated college student with five years of undergrad studies under her belt would be accustomed to it by now. Well, you'd be wrong, but then again, so was I.

My semester began with a bang, but certainly with a bit more solemn a note. After all, a big chapter of my life is about to close, and honestly? That comes with so many different emotions. On one hand, it is very exciting, and the other, terrifying. Naturally, that's enough to make anyone stop and think about their future. (And hopefully, you'd already be doing that in my position). God has blessed me with a director's position in Liberty University's Center for Entrepreneurship, and my classes have been good, but challenging. Due to this schedule, life has been rushing forward at a breakneck pace, and I often have felt like I'm just along for the ride.

Have you ever felt like God is doing something big, but you yourself aren't even sure what that means? Or, it could very well be the opposite; have you felt like God is doing nothing in your life at all? Either way you feel, both are incredibly valid and need to be understood.

For me, its been a great degree of both. For the past month or so, I've felt very stuck, to a point of great frustration. After all, I'm about to graduate, and feeling stuck isn't a comforting thing when you feel like you're about to take off from a runway. Oh, speaking of runways, that leads to the next part. God gave me the incredible opportunity to attend CRU's internship preview weekend, and that meant I had to fly for the first time. Now, let me explain something here. I'm by no means afraid of heights, and have always been enamored by anything to do with wings. Well, that shouldn't surprise you, given the kind of novels I write. Anyway, it was through this experience that I not only learned I love flying as I always thought I would, but I learned a whole lot about myself, too. The weekend was truly amazing, and a gift from God. I met so many awesome people from all over the country, and got to know an organization that makes a real impact for Christ.

Then, I came back home, in a way confused, but also supercharged in my excitement. In the days that followed, I would have another incredibly awesome opportunity seemingly pop out of nowhere (as God likes to do), and then, it seemed as if everything was made clear. For about four years now, as some of you know well, I have felt God calling me to go to Germany. I'm not sure for how long, or what He even wants me to do over there, but I cannot deny that he has placed that country on my heart. I may, at long last, have a chance to travel overseas, and I truly am so excited to see if I can get this chance! Long story short, God used a crazy trip to show me that I had been discrediting myself, and it gave me the courage to see more of what I truly wanted, and where I want to go. God is my king even in the chaos, and despite the turmoil of the "what's next?" questions that scream in my mind, I know that He is guiding me through it. You see, God has this way of pulling us out of our comfort zones to show us who He is. And sometimes, who we are, too.

But courage isn't often easy, and honestly, I don't think it ever will be. There have been many times in my life when I haven't felt even a bit of courage, and the darkness seemed to be much stronger then God. Perhaps you're in a similar place now. Maybe you can't see the light in your life, if you think there is any at all. Does hopelessness knock at your door? It could be. We are often so good at hiding what's hurting our hearts, to the point that we have hidden that hurt from ourselves. Despite what you may think, God doesn't want you drowning in the darkness, and He hasn't abandoned you if you feel that way. Sometimes God speaks to us in very strange ways. Whether it was through a trip, a friend, a person you've never met, or even a sign; He doesn't ever stop talking to us. Our problem is that we need to be better listeners.

Regardless of where you are in life, know that you're not alone. It isn't hopeless, no matter the situation. Your life isn't pointless, even when your head screams at you and tells you that nothing matters, including yourself. God has the victory, the enemy is defeated, and courage isn't lost even when the heart feels too heavy to carry one more burden. Press onward, even in the darkest moment, and I promise you that when that first ray of light touches your skin, you'll realize that the fight was worth it, all along. 

Depression: Waging a Different Kind of War

When war is mentioned, vivid images of violence and destruction often come to mind. A struggle between forces for a cause, or sometimes, none at all. War involves great cost, and even greater loss. How many have died defending their country, spilling their blood for an idea, or simply an order? Regardless of your political views on war, there simply are times when peace isn't an option. When the only other alternative is death and destruction, you'll find that action is a very convincing decision. It never ceases to amaze me how far people will go to survive, no matter what.

War is a commonly understood term, but can there be different kinds of war that can't be waged the same way? Perhaps a type of war that lingers far closer to home, and can ring louder then gunfire in our homes and media? Friends, I must say that there indeed is. This war affects many, it is wide in its spread, and horrific in its reach. It all begins with two words. 

Depression. Suicide.

Several years ago, I never would have thought that those two words would one day have such a depth of meaning in my life. Given that those words carried little weight in my own existence, I honestly didn't have much knowledge on the subject. I was, as one would say, naive to the ever-growing problem that was rapidly spreading in the world around me. The war that was taking hold. This war is often silent, and remains (unfortunately) covert in our day-to-day lives.

Unless you've been touched by it.

I remember feeling confused when my best friend of twelve years began acting 'strange'. From my perspective, there really wasn't any other way to put it. Her joy and excitement in life began to fade away, and a darkness settled in her eyes that honestly terrified me. I remember thinking, "what's wrong with her? She's not being herself." As the days turned to months, and months to years, I watched her slip further and further into a shadow of herself, and I was helpless, unable to do anything but watch in frightened confusion. Sure, I tried to talk to her about it, but it never really got anywhere. It felt like a wall was being built between us, but it was a structure not simply wrought by human hands, often not even her own. But how could it be breached?

What was I missing?

Unbeknownst to myself, that war was waging in my friend's mind and heart, a war of natural ailments, but also spiritual causes. I had known that she had been fighting severe anxiety, as well as other situations that had taken a heavy toll on her mentally and physically. The depression was showing its ugly head with fading discretion, and the battles were very hard for us both. Even in the times when she wouldn't act like herself, I had refused to abandon her, and stuck with her through it. I've always believed she was (and still is) worth loving, and never listened when she told me to pay no attention to her lows. Well...I'm sure glad I didn't listen.

As time sped on, the war continued to rage, growing louder and louder until it was nearly impossible to be noticed. Before I knew it, it was time for me to head off to college, and I suddenly found myself in a new place, my old life behind me. Uprooted from my home and placed into new soil, a day still didn't go by without texting or talking to my friend. I had known she wasn't doing too well. However, I hadn't been aware of HOW dangerous things were becoming. It began to concern me when there was an increase of late-night talks that were riddled with negativity and suicidal jokes. I never found them funny, but the rate of their increase had me concerned. Then, I remember asking the question. Was she suicidal? She'd always tell me she was fine, but a part of me didn't believe her.

Something just never sat right, and it continued to eat at me until it couldn't be denied. Even then, when I wasn't fully aware of the severe danger of the situation, I had begun to realize that there was something incredibly sinister going on. It wasn't drama, no was it an overreaction on either of our parts; it was a war. Some kind of sick, quiet, despicably mad war terrorizing us. The problem? It was going largely unaddressed, and my friend was very much alone. Even then, not having a full understanding of the situation, God was tugging on my heart to reach out even more, and to be there for her when she hit her lows. And so I did, to the best of my strength, and it's by God alone that we both got through those times.

It was definitely by God alone that we endured the trials to come.

Everything changed when I began to have a series of nightmares that scared me so bad, I had no choice but to jump into action. The dreams all centered on my friend's death, specifically death by suicide. I have always had very vivid dreams, but to have several of these dreams with such a heavy, scary reoccurring theme...something had to be wrong. It wasn't until the fourth dream really rattled me to the core that I spoke up to her about them. I hadn't wanted her to think that I was crazy (it's not the first time I've had very realistic, scary dreams) but I knew I had to act. I told her about them, and she was completely stunned. To my shock (and honestly, horror) she told me that the worst of the dreams was prophetic. She had planned to act that nightmare out, and to this day we both believe that God warned us through that dream, and inadvertently stopped her from making a terrible mistake.

Now, please understand that I am telling this story with all the respect and sensitivity possible. This war we both found ourselves in wasn't a game, and lives were at stake. I say lives because I truly believe that had my friend committed suicide, it would have opened the door for more loss in the wake of such tragedy. 

Over the following summer, I had returned to the job we both worked, and I realized that nothing was changing, and definitely not getting better. And so, I asked the question. I asked her if she were seriously suicidal, and as opposed to an answer hidden behind a phone screen, she couldn't hide the truth. I remember watching as she hung her head, and despite her walls, they crumbled to reveal the truth. Yes...she was. And she was in danger. 

It was then that I was faced with a sobering question: how far would I be willing to go to save someone I loved? Not that I could save her, if anything, I felt just as trapped and helpless as she did in that moment. However, even though I'm not God, and I can't save people, I can be the hands and feet of Jesus, and be a light in the darkness. So that's what I tried to do. I asked her to seek out help through counseling, something that she hadn't been very willing to do. Whether it was because of my stubbornness, or God's prompting, she made the steps to get professional help. 

As time has passed, she has made a tremendous amount of recovery, but the war isn't over, yet. The thing that comes to mind in this situation ironically has nothing to do with depression, but I feel it is still applicable. In Thomas Paine's American Crisis, he had written something that always made me ponder on its meaning.

"These are the times that try men's souls. The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country; but he that stands by it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, it not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives every thing its value."

Obviously Paine wrote this when my country was embittered in warfare that didn't seem to ever have victory in sight. Many refused to fight, others fled in fear, and yet some still stood to fight with a dream in their hearts that many never lived to see. As Christians, we have to view this war with depression as a very real conflict that requires very real action. Paine said that they had to stand with their country, and I say this could be applied to our friends and loved ones in the fight with depression. Will we stand with them through this fight? Or will we be 'summer soldiers', only fit to support and encouraged when it's a good day? 

"The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph." 

Can we not apply this to depression? It's certainly not an easy conflict, nor is it a short one...but it doesn't come without grace. God doesn't abandon His children, and depression, though aggressive and ugly, doesn't stand a chance against the might of our God. 

Yes, depression is a war. And like every war requires, we must be armed with the appropriate weapons in order to wage it and win. If your friend a loved one is lost in the mire of isolation and defeat, it is up to you to with seemingly no way out, then we must jump down in there with them and stick by their side through the firefight. This war can be won. Let me repeat that, this war CAN be won. It doesn't have to end in heartbreak, anger, and shame. We don't have to sit through another funeral, another memorial service, or even send another confused, uninformed text. We can be the light in their darkness if we allow God to use us. If we remain inactive and placidly sit on the sidelines, we aren't doing a single thing to help those who are engaged in all out war. If anything, we ourselves are to blame.

1. Paine, Thomas. The American Crisis. http://www.ushistory.org/paine/crisis/c-01.htm
2. Photo not mine, found on Google Images